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I've been into writing for years now.  I'm not the best writer, but i love expressing myself through writing.  Do enjoy :)





































          ~*~College Scholarship Essay On An Event That Occurred During My High School Career That Has Affected Or Made A Change In My Life~*~

                                           ~*~Daddy Left Me, Sad And Bruised~*~

          My dad left last year. It seemed as if he woke up one day and just decided to leave. I believe the day that had changed the way he viewed life was September 11th. Like many other Americans my father felt that he wasnt living life the way he wanted. He had a loving family and a great home and a well paying job but that just wasnt good enough for him. I suppose he felt like he was truly being someone else, maybe even living a lie.

          February 2nd of 2002 was a nerve wrecking day for me from the time I woke up to the time I went to sleep. It was the first time that I was babysitting for a two-year-old and a nine-week-old the whole day. It was a hectic experience from the start, but I made it through. When I came home my mom and dad were outside crying. The first thing that came to my mind was my grandpa and how he must have past away or something bad happened to another family member or close friends. It never occurred to me that on that day my dad was going to leave his life that he had known for 22 years behind him.

          My sister and I were so upset and wondering what could have possibly gone wrong and my parents were saying nothing. My sister left me in the computer room and I put an away message up on my AOL instant messenger saying something just isnt right. Finally I built up my nerves and opened the front door and stepped outside.

          "Youre father doesnt want to be with me anymore," were my mothers first words. I burst out crying and just went back inside and ran back into the computer room and slammed the door. My life was turned upside down. Nothing was right anymore and nothing would ever be the same. I knew I had to go somewhere, I needed to cry to someone. I just had to get out of the house. My father was packed and said he was sorry and gave me a hug and left. I ran outside, got my bike and rode to my friends house. It was the closest house I could get to in the short amount of time I had before I blew up. I couldnt even breathe.

          For a few months my father still came and worked on his computer at home. He finished renovating our bathroom and ate dinners with us every once in a while. He picked me up from work every Monday and took my sister and I out for dinner.

          My parents were keeping a secret from my sister and I. I finally learned what that secret was a few weeks after Easter. My dad picked me up from work and I was exhausted. We drove and picked up some Wendys and then stopped at a store before heading back home to drop me off. As we drove to the store my dad broke into why he left. He was gay. I went numb and had no idea what to say. I couldnt cry or talk. I just starred out the window motionless.

          I gave up and stopped caring about a lot of things after those life changing events. My grades slipped and I started doing things that I wouldnt normally do. It took a while for me to realize that I was only making things worse, not only for myself but for those people that I loved the most in my life.

          The events in my family in the past year have changed who I am completely. I never thought this would happen to my family and I still have so many questions unanswered as well as things I wished I never knew. Ignorance is bliss after all. This event has changed how I view the world thoroughly. I lost a lot when my father left. I hardly even have a relationship with him anymore and it kills me. I lost friends because I couldnt talk about how I felt and kept the pain inside and then would blow up.

          I now try to think about all the things I have gained in the past year. I finally learned who my true friends are and that I can make the best out of bad situations. I love living with my mom and my sister. I can tell them anything and I can be so open with them. This heart-wrenching event has reeked pain on my family for too long, but we have stayed strong through it all. I learned that not every bad thing that happens in life will stay that way. The way you live life and learn from mistakes makes you who you are. I must take bad experiences and turn them into good things that will make me a stronger person.

~*~ College Scholarship Essay On What My Career Goals Are~*~
 

          I want to save the world. I want to help people and learn everything about everyone. I want to understand different people and how they live their lives and how they work through heartache, family destruction and loss. I want to make people smile and laugh when they only want to cry. I want to change lives.

          Im not sure what I want to be when I grow up. That is question that has been digging father into my brain as high school comes to an end. I wanted to be a teacher, own a business and have a family. I see no reason why I have to choose just one. I might even want to become super woman if possible. I want to be many things, but most of all I want to change a persons life in the best way.

          I have many goals set for myself and being able to go to college and graduate is the next one on my list. I however know that once I am attending school something will hit me and I will finally learn what I truly want to do with my life. I have an open mind and I am ready for any opportunity that is headed my way. I might be a little ignorant in areas of life, thinking I can do whatever I want when I grow up and be whatever I want to be. I can however promise that Im going to work so hard and give a 110 percent in anything I do. This opportunity gives me a fresh start at living life to the fullest.

          I hope to graduate college with honors and work towards my dream of changing lives. Making someone smile makes my day ten times better and making them laugh is off the charts. I want to help others learn how to work through their hard times without trying to analyze them and make them feel less than significant. I want to understand why people are the way they are.

          I believe the career you choose really reflexes how a person is inside. Some might see me as a dreamer but I see myself as a believer. You can do whatever you put youre mind to and if you want something bad enough you have to go out there and grab for it and never let it go.






Ancedot
 
                                      ~*~Nothing Less Than Extraordinary~*~
 
          Everywhere I looked there were beautiful costumes. The judges were going to have a hard time choosing a winner. Beautiful princesses stood before me, with long wavy blonde wigs swaying at their sides. I on the other hand had on a pair of huge floppy shoes and a Pokka dotted wild outfit. My face was painted white, with triangles under my big brown eyes, and a bright red circle on the tip of my nose. What topped off my unique costume was a rainbow curly wig with a triangular hat that stood tall on top of my Afro.

          Each Dracula, zombie, and witch took their turn strutting across the room. I was no different, marching with a huge smile planted on my colorful face. Imagine the astonishment on my face when the judges called out my name and said I had won the contest. While I took that magnificent walk around the dance studio in front of all the other vast costumes, all I remember thinking was, "They choose me, out of everyone else."

                                                           ~*~Fat~*~

          Life growing up wasnt exactly a picnic. I was your average kid I guess, nothing special. I learned to be loud at an early age. I just had to be seen and noticed by all. I didnt realize this would give me the wrong attention, God, who ever does? I once was thin. Those years long gone now. Sad, grab a cookie, no one hears me, wheres the cake? Thats how I became the Lauren everyone knows today. I was a big child and I was teased tremendously. It was awful. I would come home in tears from the kids at school making fun of me. And I knew I was big, but I didnt think I was that big or much different from the average person. Looking back at pictures, traces of the past, I learn different.

 

~*~My Sad, Sad Excuse For A Creative Writing Story For Mrs. Taber-Whatta BIOTCH~*~

(Written In Less Than 45 Minutes, Talent, I Know HAHA)

Imagination Is the Key

          "Is he looking?"

         "No," I repeated, for what seemed like the millionth time since lunch had started.    

          "Okay...How about now?"

          Jewls glanced nervously over her shoulder. I now finally realize why she spent all of her allowance on that new, basically see-through, shirt. I have yet to notice guys are just a bunch of meaningless animals that always fart and burp.

          Jewls turned to me suddenly, her eyes sparkling with joy.

          "He looked at me," she stated and then paused for a moment. "And he smiled."

          I sighed heavily. This seemed to be a little too much, even for me. Pathetic I thought to myself. I couldn't even finish my BLT. I wrapped up the rest of my gross sandwich and tossed it into a near by garbage. Maybe some day, hopefully soon, Jewls will see how ridiculous she looks drooling over some guy.

          As I get up to leave I mutter a quick goodbye to Jewls. She hardly notices my farewell. I suppose when you lose your mind, over a stupid boy; youll forget the simple things and your friends.

          As I leave the cafeteria I am reminded of how I promised myself back in the fourth grade that I would never like boys. And sure, I am a lot older now, but I am much wiser too. High school boys are so...

          Okay so maybe my only excuse to not liking the male species is the fact that they have never showed any interest in me. Come on now, that cant be my fault; I just think they all are crazy. Im a great person. I play some sports, Im really, REALLY smart and I am a magnificent artist. Who wouldnt want me? Im too good for all those stupid guys.

          Although, Im not the prettiest girl in the world and come to think of it, Im not too thin either, but that cant be a reason why no one likes me or has, right?

          I quicken my pace and reach my English classroom. Finally, English class awaits, two periods left on this long Tuesday afternoon. I stumble into the classroom, the first one there. I smirk at the essays on the wall and my eyes fall upon my own. An A, what else would I have gotten.

          Okay, maybe I should work on my attitude and stop thinking Im Gods gift to the world. But if no one else tells me how great I am, shouldnt I just tell myself?

          Suddenly I sense someones presence lurking through the classroom door, trying to be discrete, in order not to disturb me I suppose. I quickly do a 180 and turn to face my opponent. By the window on the opposite side of the classroom was the most gorgeous creature I have EVER seen in my entire life.

          "WOW!"

          "Excuse me?"

          Ohmygosh, did I just say that out loud? Crap what do I do now!

          "Wow, I, uh, didnt realize what a nice day we were having."  Stupid Christy I mutter to myself.

          "Oh, Okay."

          Must stop starring I repeat over in my newly jumbled up brain and forced my eyes to direct themselves to my binder in search of new treasure that I knew Id never find.

          Sigh, a new boy in class and a HOT new boy at that. But wait, I dont like guys I repeat over and over refreshing my cranium.

          "Hello?"

          "Huh? What do you want?"

           "I said my name is Jake, whats yours?"

           "Christy," I basically shouted, damn excitement gets the best of me sometimes.

            Why is he showing an interest in me? Did I have some lettuce from my BLT wedged in-between my two front teeth? I quickly took out my mirror from my bag and turned to check; nothing. Well that was a definite plus.

          I could have been completely disturbing looking today I suddenly realize. One of my better hair days, actually sitting straight and black instead of frizzy and out there. Usually I dont bother doing my hair, I guess it was an accident that I actually got up early this morning to get done.

        I peak at Jake, (what a great name), out of the corner of my eye. I catch him starring back at me. He turned suddenly. Was that slight rouge on his cheeks appearing because hes blushing? Why was he looking at me anyway, Im nothing great, nothing more than ordinary.

          Glancing up towards the clock I notice that there are still 10 minutes until the warning bell rings. Soon everyone will be leaving lunch and rushing to their 6th period class. People are really annoying. I just know they are going to interrupt my chance in talking to Jake again when all those pretty girls begin to take their seats. Yeah, hes going to have better people to look at when they stud in, and then Ill be history.

          Damn I want to talk to him so bad. Boy crazy, hell I cant be boy crazy, not now, not ever. Oh no, this is the beginning; it all begins with one guy. Hell break my heart. I can see it all now.

          Well start dating next week and go out the rest of high school. Well be the center of attention and invited to every cool party. Well call each other sweetheart and apply to the same colleges. Well dance the night away when prom comes around and will make an appearance at every after-party. Well both graduate with honors and go away to college and be in every class together. Once we graduate college well plan our brilliant wedding. Lots of white doves a huge cake, with chocolate pudding and strawberry filling. Well say I do and then go and venture off and explore the world for a year. Well visit Italy, Germany, England and everywhere in between. Well then come home and be so in love and plan on starting our own business. Yeah a successful business is a great idea; hell look great in one of those armoni suits.

          Once our business becomes successful well plan on starting our family. I want a small family, just a set of twins, a boy and a girl. Well name our son Jake, after his daddy and then our girl will be named Jordan. Our children will be brilliant, because of my mind and beautiful, because of his face.

          Just when everything seems too perfect, hell go and hang out with the guys one night and meet some striking, younger women and decide to leave the kids and me. Ill have to go on welfare and Ill be crying every night and my life be ruined. Ill never see the love of my life ever again. My children will all run away and Ill lose my mind. I will then be alone for the rest of my life, pondering over why I ever started dating Jake in high school, wishing I wasnt such a stupid, boy-crazy girl.

          "Christy, are you okay?"

          Whoa, I completely dazed out, and the room was starting to fill up with my classmates and I see Jewls walk in with the man of her dreams.

          "Christy?"

          "Oh Im sorryuhJake, I was in my own little world."

          "Well it seems like that would be an interesting world to take a walk through sometime," he smiled slightly, not quite finished talking. "I wanted to ask you if you could possibly show me around town today, since Im new and everything."

           "WellI guess thatll be alright."

           "Great, talk to you after class," he exclaims as he runs to his seat before the bell rings.

             Well, maybe itll be worth it all in the end, I think to myself as I begin to drift into my daydream mode of the possibilities for this afternoon.

 





































~*~Strawberries And Sunsets~*~
 

          The future is a big blur, not even dreams can show me what will occur. De'savu is all you can reach out and grab when you feel it upon shaking up a moment in time. My life has been nothing but full of strange events, memorable to all whom have experienced them with me. Ive always been the type of person who wanted to effect people and their lives in the best ways. At least thats how I see myself nowadays, on my verge of becoming an 18-year-old young woman. Ive learned so much these past 17 years. How to deal with heartache, a parents separation and eventually divorce. How to get over your first crush, work through problems with your best friends and realize that not everyone will love you.

          Childhood was nothing but extraordinary to me. When I look back on everything I did as a child it truly baffles me. The friendships Ive made, as well as the journeys and adventures Ive been on and the goals Ive accomplished. Memories fill my head and sometime i wonder how I even remember them all, it is so unreal how I can picture the exact day when I moved into this house, located on pueblo court, in Sayville, NY. I was only three, yet I remember coming into my new home and looking across the room and seeing my nannie and poppy sitting directly across my me on our living room couch. The same exact one we have still today. Later that day the neighbors next door and diagonally across the street made their way over to our new home with greetings and open arms. Thats the day I met my best friend. A girl who has had so much impact on my life, someone I dont see often, but have gotten so close with within these past few years alone. That little girl is Meg Griffith. She visits her Mimi every year, vacations and summer time. We were playing with my new plastic toy golf set. I never did like golf, nor was I very good.